In addition to turning wood, I have been doing a lot of painting lately. The process of painting is also a very meditative and healing experience for me. I become lost in the colors, the brush strokes, the layers.
The original painting in these photos is of an encaustic-inspired mixed media piece I finished recently. I called it “My Secret Garden.” I created layers upon layers with a base of alcohol inks and acrylic paints. Each layer is covered with a mixture of Golden Heavy Gel Matte and Regular Gel Gloss plus a dash of water. This creates a wax-like finish without all the mess (and expense) of a traditional bees-wax encaustic medium.
Each layer contains a variety of items including gold leaf, wire mesh, buttons, copper wire, beads, dried flowers, feathers, and etc.
My inspiration came from spending time in nature and my garden. It is taking the time to slow down, breathe, and open your eyes to all the hidden treasures in life. It’s about searching through all the layers to find that one thing that touches our souls.
To see more photos or to purchase this piece, visit me Etsy shop here.
Over the past year I have been exploring many new avenues for artistic expression. One of them has been turning wood on a lathe.
I have always been drawn to wood and woodworking but never gave it a go until this year. After receiving my first mini lathe for my birthday, I jumped right in and fell immediately in love with turning.
Turning a Spalted Maple bowl.
It is an incredibly meditative craft. I find my mind focused completely on the piece of wood as it turns. The beauty and unique qualities of each piece are revealed with every new cut my tool makes.
Adding the finish to the Big Leaf Maple bowl while chucked on the lathe.
Turning wood has become the perfect peaceful endeavor for me during these tumultuous and crazy times in our world. When I can’t get out in nature, it allows me to hold a piece of it in my hands, work to enhance its beauty, and clears my mind of the endless stream of unimportant chatter.Each one of my pieces are created with reclaimed wood from fallen trees. You can view more of my work here.
In the midst of all the hate-filled rhetoric and fear going on right now in this country I have found a greater need to spend time out in nature in order to ground myself and find peace.
My goal is to share the beauty of nature with others so that they too might find that same peace and be encouraged get out and commute with nature themselves.
So, here are a few of my favorite Zen moments from my journeys.
It has been quite some time since I have posted on my blog. I have been very busy teaching and exploring. I decided it was past time and wanted to share some of the beautiful fall colors I found while on a hike in the Sierras the other day.
Just a quick post to announce an upcoming gallery exhibition. Two of my iPhone photomontages were selected for the Academy of Art University MFA Photography Alumni exhibition opening May 5th.
At the outer edges of my noisy world exists a little cabin in the woods. A place where my soul can go to rest and reconnect with Nature and all of its beautiful gifts.
Whenever I go there it’s as if my soul does a giant exhale. A spewing out of all the damaging stress to make room for peace and healing.
“Heaven is under our feet as well as over our heads.” ~ Henry David Thoreau
“The clearest way into the Universe is through a forest wilderness.” ~ John Muir
“All that live must die, passing through nature to eternity.” ~ William Shakespeare
“Spring has returned. The Earth is like a child that knows poems.” ~ Rainer Maria Rilke
“Those who contemplate the beauty of the earth find reserves of strength that will endure as long as life lasts. … There is something infinitely healing in the repeated refrains of nature — the assurance that dawn comes after night, and spring after winter.” ~ Rachel Carson
Spring is when I spend a lot of time in the garden kneeling down at eye level with all the flowers that seem to pop up and bloom overnight. I try to take some time daily to search for all the small details that are missed when caught up in our busy world. When you stop and look closely, it’s as if an entire parallel universe exists between the petals and stamen, the soil and grass. Sometimes while lost in a patch of Poppies I imagine a tiny world of faeries that flit about on lacy wings as they tend to the garden. If you look closely, you too might find them.
I shot these photos on my iPhone and edited them on my iPad with the PicFX and Procreate apps.
March is a time for renewal, when the first buds of early Spring begin to push their way towards the surface. The days become a bit longer, less dark and bleak. Flocks of birds begin to fly overhead and make their way north after a long winter layover. Their excited squacks and cackles instill a sense of hope in my soul, but also a feeling of sadness that I never took the time to visit them while they were at rest here in our valley. My soul was tucked away in front of the warm fire, wrapped in reflection, which is where winter often sends me.
I stand in my backyard as a family of Sandhill Cranes ride a thermal right above me. Their giant wings glide in circles as their gutteral call rolls from their beaks in an ecstatic chorus. They circle and glide, resting for the long trip ahead, a momentary pause in their journey as if saying goodbye. A tear escapes my eye as I look up and wish them a safe flight.
The sun sneaks out between big white clouds and leftover raindrops that have settled on the new blooms begin to shimmer. My focus shifts from the vast expanse of the sky above back to the tiny things below me. The longer I stare, the more amazed I become. This micro world of color and light comes alive as if the entire universe exists in this few inches of earth within my vision. Life and death begin and end there. Spring approaches to remind us it is our job to live, to let go of the darkness, emerge from our coccoons and acknowledge the beauty in all that we have been given.
My son Justin was born with an obscure genetic syndrome called FG. It is a multiple anomaly syndrome that includes atypical facial features, learning disabilities, speech issues, autistic-like behaviors, attention deficits, occasional behavioral issues, and in my son’s case a seizure disorder. Despite all the things he has had to battle in his life, Justin has grown into a wonderful, outgoing, independent man with a full social calendar and a lot of friends who love him.
I created this piece while wondering what the world might look like through Justin’s eyes. He has always had a vivid imagination and has had difficulty filtering sounds and visual stimuli. I imagine he sees the world as one big noisy party of color, light, and movement.
My take on the current political environment and the 2016 elections. This was shot on my iPhone and edited on my iPad using the Juxtaposer and Procreate apps.
Just a quick post. This is a new photomontage I created today. It is my homage to the dangers of life in the big city. I shot all the elements on my iPhone and edited it on my iPad using a variety of apps including Juxtaposer, PicFX, Pic Grunger, Stackables, and Procreate.
The Timber Men. The burly men. The axe and chainsaw wielding men. The arbiters of a healthy forest.They prune and lift and fell when needed, like surgeons with their trusty tools.
At times they climb trees like Spiderman with their lengthy webs of rope. Just a little bit slower, and a lot more cautious. they face danger without much pause.
Determined, they continue their dance towards the top.
Like Goliath, they possess a super human strength…
Whatever is taken, is given back , in order to enrich the cycle of life…
The Timber Men. The burly men. The axe and chainsaw wielding men. The super heroes of a sustainable forest.
I wander the streets of the city and capture the quiet things that call to me in the midst of all the noise.
The messages are sometimes cryptic, sometimes clear.
Trust Your Struggle…
Shapes and patterns and colors all hold me spellbound. Mindful meditation magnets that drown out the noise and movement pollution all around me. I am sucked in, wondering whose hands painted, created, imagined the things I see.
I am beyond thrilled to receive an Honorable Mention in the Visual FX category of the 2015 Mobile Photography Awards for my photomontage “Mama Gaia.” Since it’s inception it has grown into the world’s largest mobile photography and art competition and touring exhibit. My congratulations to all winners and mentions! It is an honor to be among such amazing mobile artists.
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I think often about the strangers I have met. They come to me in different places on their journey; the young, the old, the worn, and the tired. They each have a story to tell, written in the pain along the edges of their faces and the in shadows that have settled in their eyes.
There is something that draws me to them. Some distant feeling of recognition. I understand their pain, their sorrows, their fears. A piece of me wants to ignore them and move on with my day in search of beauty. While a part of me feels drawn to stop and talk to them, it is at the risk of revisiting those dark memories hidden away so conveniently inside my mind.
They are a reflection of all that can go wrong with this life, with the mind, the heart, the body, and soul. Lost in the shuffle of humanity and caught in a downward cycle of demise, they exist on the other side of the thin veil between a successful life and some sordid alternate reality. The mirror they hold up forces us to look into ourselves and question our
own choices and circumstance, and causes us to wonder why this world can be so incredibly cruel. So we divert our eyes, walk on by, and pretend they don’t exist.
Are they there because of the choices they make? Or have their lives been dismantled by ugly circumstances beyond their control, by the terrifying things we cannot see? Who are we to judge them? Really. We are all human beings. That is our common ground from the beginning.
I am always surprised when I take the risk and reach out to talk with those strangers who cross my path. Some of their stories are harrowing, some extremely sad. While others admit to choices that have lead them to where they sit, others are like free spirits who choose to remain there, like gypsies, unbound by societal demands. Some are clearly in need of help for both physical and mental ailments but lack the resources and the ability to seek it on their own.
Some have been well educated with degrees and plenty of job experience. I have met teachers, artists, musicians, and even a former attorney. Each one had a different story surrounding the tipping point that lead them out onto the streets. Many have spent their lives running from the shadows of an ugly childhood, and like the many Veterans I meet, are struggling with the horrors of PTSD.
Just a quick post to say thank you all for your support for my recent post about my favorite mobile storytelling app Steller. My Steller story “Pow Wow” has received over 24k page views and yesterday it reached the #2 position of Most Viewed on Steller.
There is a wonderful visual storytelling app for both Android and iOS mobile phones called Steller. I happened across it while doing research for a course I am writing for the Academy of Art University and recently downloaded the free app to give it a test drive. Steller allows you to create beautiful visual stories with photos, video, and text and the process is straight forward and absolutely seamless.
The design is fairly minimalist and very elegant in appearance. There are currently eleven templates to choose from for designing your stories. Each one has a different look and offer several choices when it comes to the layout of your individual pages.
The first step is to choose a template or theme for your story.
You will be prompted to choose 20 videos or photographs to import into your story. You can always rearrange and edit design layout or swap out photos and videos before publishing.
You will choose a title and subtitle if you have one and can change the layout of your title page as well as the image that appears here.
You can add additional pages as video, photo or text. The recommended length of a story is around 20 pages, however you can certainly make it longer if you feel the need.
You can add text below images by choosing different layouts for each page.
Or have multiple pages of straight text if you are feeling a bit more like Mark Twain.
Steller is also a wonderful community filled with talented individuals and you can create collections of the stories you like and name your collections anything you desire. You can also share and comment on other Steller user’s stories and follow them, similar to Instagram.
Once you hit publish, you can share your story within the app to your plethora of social media accounts and watch the magic happen. If you are lucky and the Steller gods are smiling down upon you, your story might be handpicked by Steller’s editors to be featured in one of their collections. When this happens your exposure increases exponentially and you might even find your story going viral.
Below are a few of my own Steller stories. You will find links to view them underneath each image and if you already have the Steller app, you can find and follow me here: http://steller.co/TracyJThomas
My most recent Steller story on the Kootenai Pow Wow in Bonners Ferry, Idaho made it into the top 10 most viewed stories this afternoon with over 6,140 views and was featured in both the Stellerverse and the Most Viewed collections. You can view the story here: https://steller.co/s/5EeDxX32fH6
This Steller story highlights some of my quirky mobile photomontage pieces. It was featured in Steller’s Creative Collection and received over 5,000 views. You can view this story here: https://steller.co/s/5EK56vcWwGH
This is a story I created on the California drought that illustrates the dire situation at Folsom Lake, the reservoir that provides drinkng water for nearly half a million residents across the Sacramento region. This story also received over 5,000 views. You can view this story here: https://steller.co/s/5DuPxgdv3Xz
Overall, I am truly impressed with the quality and ease of use of the Steller app. The only thing I don’t like is the fact you can’t embed the stories directly into WordPress blog posts. The app provides the embed code for each story, but so far the code gets stripped every time I try it and pasting a straight link into the blog does not bring the story in either. My hope is the app’s developers will soon decide to work with the WordPress embed guidelines so Steller stories will be easier to share in all their glory.
Now go out and get your free copy and start creating your own Steller stories! http://steller.co
One of my favorite places to wander and take photographs is along the Deep Water Channel across from the Port of Sacramento. The shipping channel was built in 1949 and is 30 feet deep and 43 miles long, running from Suisun Bay to an inland harbor in West Sacramento. The port was opened to deep sea traffic in 1963. Too shallow for container ships, the channel accommodates ships that carry bulk products like corn, rice, barley, almonds, and wheat as well as cement, lumber, clay, and metals.
Every time I visit I see something new. Whether it be another ship in port, a crew rowing a sculling boat, a fisherman paddling a kayak, or a calm reflection on the water, I am drawn to pull out my camera and capture the moment.
When I started out in mobile photography about five years ago now I found great joy in expressing my creative urges through constructed photographs, better known as photomontage. This was a 360 degree move away from the straight black and white street photography I had been shooting over a three-year period for my MFA thesis project in Documentary photography.
At the point when I picked up my first iPhone and began to shoot and play with photography apps, I had reached the emotional burnout phase in my thesis project. It was an intense study and all I wanted and needed to do after presenting and defending my thesis was to play and create quirky, beautiful pieces of art. In a sense it was art therapy in order to heal myself from the stress of my project. That phase continued for three years.
It was a great time in my life. My photomontage pieces were being exhibited in galleries across the globe and found their way onto the pages of mainstream publications, while many pieces sold and ended up in private collections. I felt free to create my own surreal, entertaining worlds which provided me with a temporary escape from reality and I was in awe and surprised at the response these pieces received.
It has now been a few years since I have spent any focused time on creating photomontage works. For the past two years I moved back towards straight photography again with some street, documentary, and macro work. Recently I felt moved to create another photomontage piece called “The Butterfly Effect” which was highlighted on this blog after I reviewed the Juxtaposer app. I decided on a whim to enter this piece in a call for art for the Mobile Digital Art and Creativity Summit Exhibition that was going to be held in the prestigious Palo Alto Art Center.
Last month I received the news that “The Butterfly Effect” had been chosen as a finalist for the mDAC exhibition and would be on display at the Palo Alto Art Center through the month of August. I was thrilled.
We attended the exhibition opening and had a great time soaking in all the amazing art created on iPhones and iPads. There are two categories of art on display. My piece is in the Mobile Photography Art category. The second category is Mobile Digital Painting for which I have a ton of respect. Below is a slideshow with some photographs of the event and a lot of the beautiful art created on mobile devices.
This latest experience has been a great motivator for me to create more photomontage pieces. I am currently working on a piece to enter for an upcoming exhibition that explores the imagery and concepts depicted by 14th century Surrealist Dutch painter Hieronymus Bosch. Such a fun study!
I love macro photography. It forces me to slow down and find the astounding beauty in the small things. Details and activity that aren’t always apparent to the naked eye become revealed when shooting macro.
In the past, the majority of my macro photographs have been taken with my DSLR and a special 90mm macro lens. This setup requires patience and a good tripod to capture the images I desire since the camera and lens combination are heavy and a bit bulky.
On my most recent sojourn into the woods, I decided to forego my DSLR and shoot exclusively with my iPhone6. I had planned to focus on landscapes, wildlife, and documentary work at a Pow Wow I would attend. This was a partial experiment in minimizing as well as a true test of the capabilities of my iPhone.
While wandering the property one day and shooting landscapes I noticed a beautiful Dragonfly sitting on a leaf. I wished at that moment that I had my DSLR macro setup with me. I played with one of my go-to camera apps and zoomed in on the insect but the quality of a straight zoom wasn’t as sharp nor as close as I desired for the beautiful detail of the Dragonfly. Then I remembered a recent post someone made on Facebook about the Camera+ app and its macro option. I opened the app, chose the macro option and was immediately amazed at how close I was able to zoom in on the bug and the sharpness of detail it provided. Additionally, there was great DOF and even some Bokeh or lens flare effect in certain lighting conditions.
The downfall of using an app for macro with the iPhone and no lens attachment is the lack of extreme sharpness. The fact you are using digital zoom causes the focus to fall off a bit and throws in some pixelation. Printing out macro photos in large scale with this technique would not provide you with the best quality. However, smaller prints and posting digital images can offer some very compelling imagery.
Below are a few screenshots of the app and its macro mode followed by a series of images I shot at the cabin.
**This screenshot is of an Iris through the Normal mode of Camera+. Even in this straight shot there is some nice depth of field and Bokeh in the background.**
**When you click on the “+” symbol to the right of the shutter buttonthe menu including the mode buttons appear.**
**When you click on the Macro button, the app zooms in on your subject. Note the “Stabilizer” button. I played around with this feature but do not recommend using it in Macro mode especially if you are trying to capture something that may move out of your frame quickly like an insect. When you have the Stabilizer on it won’t allow you to take a shot until the camera is very still (the shutter button turns red when not stable, yellow when you are getting closer, and green when stable and you can take the shot). This would be a great feature when you have your iPhone secured to a tripod and are shooting something that won’t fly away from you like a flower, but I found it frustrating to use when stabilizing by hand and attempting to get off a quick shot before my subject buzzed away into the sunset.
**Once you take your first shot in Macro mode, a zoom slider appears to your right which will allow you to get even closer to your subject. The photo below is of the Iris in Macro mode with 3x magnification. What appeared with my naked eye to be a discolored spot on the drying flower petal turned out to be revealed as an interesting little striped bug when I shot in Macro mode. (These screenshots are not the sharpest of images because it is pretty difficult to hold the phone steady when trying to simultaneously click the power button and the shutter to capture the image on screen, but you get the idea, right?)
Below are several of the macro shots I captured with this app while at the little cabin in the woods.
Overall I believe the Camera+ Macro feature is a great one especially for the photographer who doesn’t want to spend a lot of money and time on expensive cameras and macro lense setups. The downside is the falloff you receive when using digital zoom as opposed to shooting with a sharp add on lens with optical zoom. Rumors have it that the next iteration of the iPhone (iPhone 6S) will have a dual lens array which means it will have optical zoom built-in. Now that will be a killer combination with any macro app.
I grew up in a Christian church and one of the biggest lessons I learned while I was there was love. I was taught that Jesus was the type of man who hung out with thieves, prostitutes, and the poor and loved each one of them in the same way he loved others. I was also taught that our place is not to judge others lest we be judged ourselves. The whole “he who casts the first stone” lesson.
The U.S. supreme Court decision on Friday that supported the right of same-sex couples to marry created much joy in the hearts of those who have been in support of equal rights for gay people. Those supporters include individuals from all walks of life. For those individuals, the fight has always been about love, not about any hidden “gay agenda” and definitely not about discrimination or hatred.
Mixed in with all the love and celebration of that decision came a strong dose of fear-based, judgemental, and at times hate-filled words. While those reactions were expected from the clearly bigoted, hateful groups of individuals who still exist in our country, it was disappointing to see some of these same reactions coming from people who claim to be “Christians.” The response was not Christ-like from a space of non-judgment and love. On the contrary, it was harsh, judgmental, and oft-times hateful.
There seems to be a great misunderstanding amongst some Christians (note I said “some” not “all”) of the Fundamental, Evangelical, or Conservative persuasions, that you cannot be gay and be a Christian. They take a stance of “us against them.” The “righteous against the sinners.” The “good against the bad.” The “moral against the immoral.” What an unfortunate, disillusioned, and limiting stance. In reality, a great number of gay people are indeed Christian. They go to church, they hold Bible studies, they pray for your souls, they feed and clothe the hungry. There are also Buddhists, Jews, Muslims, Agnostics, Sikhs, Atheists, Wiccans, etc.; the same mix of faiths and belief systems as the rest of our wonderful country.
We are all human beings. We all deserve love. We all deserve equal rights no matter what our religious or spiritual stance may be. Basic human rights has absolutely nothing to do with your religion. We all should have equal protection under the law. The law of our country is not the Bible or God’s law. It is the Constitution. If the law of the land were based on one religion, then that would impede on the rights of others who choose to believe something different.
Gay people were given the Constitutionally protected right to marry the person they love. This in no way, shape or form infringes upon your right to choose who you will marry. It in no way, shape, or form infringes on your right to choose the religion you want to practice. You can still go to your churches, still read your Bibles, still pray for the souls of those you care about. Nothing has changed except for a new challenge to your own hearts. Acceptance.
We all have the opportunity right now to choose love and acceptance. There has been way too much judgment, hatred, fear, and misunderstanding surrounding the issue of gay rights coming from all sides. It’s past time for all who call themselves “Christians” to be the example and reflect how Jesus would want us to be. He would expect nothing less than for us to love one another in both word and deed and cast all judgment aside.
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I will be journeying back into the woods for fifteen days beginning this Wednesday. I will post regular updates about my journey on Instagram, Twitter, and Periscope (search Tracy J. Thomas on Periscope app) so follow me on any and all for some peaceful nature photos/videos, hopefully some amazing wildlife shots, and quite possibly the Aurora Borealis if they all decide to cooperate ;).
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One of my favorite mobile photography apps for editing product photos isBig Lensby Reallusion, Inc. Since I am exclusively an Apple finatic, I can’t speak to the Android version of this app, however the reviews on Google Play are just as solid as they are on iTunes.
I can’t quite agree with the Developer’s claims that this app will “turn your iPhone into a professional SLR camera.” Sorry, but there is currently no app on the market that can do that. There are indeed apps that will allow you to have some similar capabilities or at least mimic fairly well the capabilities of a lower end SLR, but the bottom line is there (currently) is no comparison between an iPhone or Android and a high-end DSLR.
There are many in the mobile photography world who would argue vehemenently against the above sentiment, however, when it comes to straight shooting there can be no argument about the quality of the end result when comparing the unedited photos side by side. The high-end DSLR will win hands down.
The beauty of the mobile photography movement lies in the ability to edit on-the-fly. Once a mobile photo is brought into a mobile app and edited by an experienced user it then becomes more difficult to distinguish whether it was shot originally on a mobile phone or on a DSLR.
When shooting product photography, depth of field becomes an important factor if you desire professional quality and a compelling photograph. In the past I have shot product photographs for Francis Ford Coppola’s Napa Valley wineries among others. Those shoots entailed blacking out my studio windows, positioning multiple lights, scrims, reflectors, and a plethora of high-end lenses mounted on my professional DSLR. This type of job required this type of equipment since the final images needed to be sharp and of the highest resolution possible. My iPhone would definitely not have been an appropriate tool for that particular task.
At this juncture in life, like many other crafty people, I have an Etsy shop. I like to keep my store stocked up with a variety of my handmade products so this requires a lot of product photos. Now I could go the route of spending all day setting up my studio and shooting each piece with my professional setup then spending hours on Lightroom and Photoshop editing my RAW files, but honestly, I don’t bring in enough money through my Etsy shop (yet) to pay for that type of precious time committment. So I shoot with my iPhone 6 and use wonderful apps like Big Lens to edit them into more professional looking images.
I utilize Big Lens primarily for its depth of field tools and occasionally its filters. There are several camera apps that allow you to adjust DOF in-camera while shooting, however I like to take straight shots in order to edit them any way I desire post shoot. Below I outline the process for how I use this app to edit a photograph of a piece of my handmade jewelry.
You can shoot with theBig Lens app but I prefer to shoot with ProCamera. When I am ready to edit my product photos I bring a photo into the Big Lens app by choosing “Load Photo” and import from my camera roll. The “Basic” and “Advanced” buttons are your choice for masking. I always use the “Advanced” button since it provides me with fine control over what I want masked in my image.
Before I begin to mask, I choose the “Brush” tool in order to adjust the size of the brush. This allows me to better control the edges of the mask.
In the above screenshot, for the sake of example, I am only masking a portion of my bracelet. You can utilize the “Eraser” button to be even more precise with your edges or boundaries of your mask if needed.
I personally like to mask some of the foreground in order to create a leading line from bottom of the image towards the focal point.
The above is an exaggerated example of how the masking feature works. With the current settings The DOF is extreme and the transition is not very smoothe. The leading line is sharp focus and the edges fall off the cliff into an extreme blur.
This blur transition and intensity can be adjusted via the “Aperture” setting by choosing different F-stops and adjusting the slider until you are satisfied with the result.
Above is an example of the change from 100% in F1.8 to around 30% in F2.8. A bit smoother transition.
Once I have the DOF adjusted to where I desire, I then add one of the filters. I usually choose the “Vivid” filter so the colors will pop a bit more.
The colors are now popping after adding 100% Vivid to the photograph.
The app also allows you to adjust the “Lens” style. In other words you can create a circular blur, star-shaped blur, heart blur, etc. if you feel so inclined. Additional tools allow you to adjust for focus and amount of blur.
There is also the ubiquitous “HDR” button on the top of the app. While some people like this feature, I do not like it in this app because it provides you with few options to adjust the intensity of the HDR effect such as contrast. Although the bright pink color is nice in the above photo, it is not true to the piece itself so I would not use this result to post on my shop.
One of the last wonderful things this app offers is the ability to save your images in full resolution. A very important feature when you want to present sharp, professional images.
Overall I would rate this easy to use app as a 4+. It is user-friendly, intuitive, and fun to use!
Oh, and you can purchase the handmade, hemp braided, beaded, Boho Chic, friendship bracelet featured in these photos on my Etsy shop along with much more here! 🙂
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I have always felt I would make the perfect Hermit. I love spending time alone and one of my favorite places to spend that time is lost somewhere in the forest. The noise and activity of the city excites me for short spells but grates on my nerves and makes me long for a quiet space after a day or so.
As a child I grew up in a small community surrounded by beautiful and dramatic mountain ranges. The outdoor life was all I knew. I spent my summers hiking, climbing and backpacking through forests on the Western slope of the Sierra Nevada and my winters snowshoeing, ice skating and skiing in the backcountry. There wasn’t a day that I didn’t dream of someday living in a log cabin surrounded by pines and wildlife. My interaction with nature was the best part of my childhood and became my savior during moments of stress.
Oft-times childhood dreams are cast aside for adult realities. I grew up, went away to college, and landed out in the “big world” far away from my small town hamlet. Over time I took on my big city persona and began to lose touch with nature. While swept up in that grown up life of making lots of money in order to buy lots of unnecessary “things,” I was haunted by an empty feeling deep inside my gut. Everything I was doing, every hat I wore, every role I played, felt wrong. All I could think about was sitting on the porch of that log cabin somewhere in the woods where I could breathe the earth back into my soul.
I am not the only one who has felt this way. More people have begun to heed the lure of homesteading or living off-grid and have made the bold decision to quit their corporate jobs, sell most of their belongings, and move their families onto their little patch of paradise far from the noise of the city life. I can’t think of a healthier way to exist than that of the Homesteader. To reconnect with nature, grow your own organic food, and live off the land is to me the ultimate existance. And this is exactly what we are going to do in the not too distant future.
The wheels were set in motion when we recently purchased a small log cabin on ten beautiful timbered acres in North Idaho. Over the next several years we will work to downsize or minimize our belongings; in other words let go of the “things” that don’t bring us joy in life. We will spend most of our upcoming vacation time enjoying and preparing the cabin for our eventual move. The cabin is not completely off-grid in the sense it is connected to the power grid, however it sits two miles from the nearest paved road, draws water from a well with a spring as a secondary source, and can only be accessed by skis, snowshoes, or a snowmobile in the thick of Winter and a 4-wheel-drive Quad or knee-high mud boots during the sloppy Spring thaw.
What was once a dream has now become a tangible reality and it brings such peace and joy to my heart to know it is there waiting for our ultimate arrival. We leave a week from today to pay our little piece of paradise a sixteen day visit. I can’t wait to sit on the porch swing and breathe in the beauty of the woods while dreaming of the day I will never have to leave there.
It has been awhile since I have made an update related to skin cancer. I have been focused on enjoying life since my most recent treatment ended and have placed all those not so pleasant months in the back of my mind. That strategy was working quite well for me until I went to the Dentist for my regular checkup a few weeks ago. She noticed a lesion on the left lateral portion of my tongue. Her immediate thought was something as benign as Migratory Glossitis but due to my history with skin cancer, she felt I should be seen by someone for an evaluation of the lesion. I had already set up my yearly physical with my general practitioner for the following week so when I went to see her she referred me to an ENT surgeon for evaluation the next day.
When most of us think about skin cancer we think of lesions that pop up on parts of the skin that have been exposed to UV rays. Cancerous lesions on the tongue or inside the mouth caused by UV exposure is not something we usually hear about. Alas, the ugly beast can spring up inside your mouth in the form of Squamous Cell Carcinoma or Melanoma and According to the American Cancer Society, it can indeed be caused by too much sun exposure over time. This does not mean you need to run around in the sunshine with your tongue sticking out of your mouth in order to get it.
There are of course other risk factors that can be the cause of oral cancers such as smoking and excessive alcohol use, but in my case the risk factor would appear to be excessive UV exposure and the fact that I have a history of Basal Cell Carcinoma. Thus the concern and need for evaluation.
Now I don’t know your particular level of pain tolerance but mine is pretty high. When I had both the biopsy and then Mohs surgery on my face I barely felt the needles that injected the local anesthetic right on the side of the bridge of my nose. Things were very different when it came to my tongue. Think for a second about the times you have bitten your tongue, your lip, or the inside of your cheeks and how much that hurt and continued to hurt for some time. Now multiply that pain by one hundred. The needle stick was not fun. Fortunately my tongue went instantly numb.
I have this little anxiety thing about being unable to swallow. Going to the Dentist is difficult enough for me especially when there are suction tubes and a pair of hands and instruments all up inside the small space that leads to my airway. There I was sitting in a sterile room with drool spilling down the corner of my lip, a pair of gloved hands pulling on my tongue and holding it taught while poking and cutting and digging at the mystery spot. I could feel my intense need to swallow begin to rise and I could do nothing about it.
Add to that most uncomfortable mix the warm rush of blood and a wad of gauze stuffed in my mouth to stop the bleeding and well, you can probably imagine how I felt. Then There was the tug and pull of the suture needle that went around the wound and up through the center of my tongue. Not once, but four times. Yes, I felt a bit squeamish.
The anesthetic wore off two hours after the surgery. That is when I was reminded how much we rely on this funky looking mass of muscle for a variety of things. It was extremely painful to swallow, to talk, to eat, to drink, to sneeze, to cough, to blow my nose. My tongue was swollen and angry and it let me know.
For the first three days I could only handle a liquid diet. Protein shakes and water became my friend. The dissolving stitches worked their way loose within a few hours and I became brave enough to cut the long loose ends off by myself before they made their way down my throat. Did I mention how ugly my tongue looked? Ghastly ugly indeed. I have photos but I will spare you.
The biopsy results came back within 24 hours and fortunately it is a benign epitheleal tumor in the squamous layer. Yay! We now keep an eye on it over time just to make sure it doesn’t grow back into something malignant.
Beyond this little inconvenient interim reminder that I will most likely face additional skin cancers in my lifetime, my full body skin recheck appointment is not until mid-August with my Dermatologist. So after this painful biopsy spot decides to heal completely (it has been one week now and it still hurts to eat, to talk, to swallow) I will be back to living and enjoying life mindfully.
Did I mention that in the midst of all this fun I came down with a Streptococcus infection and am now on a regiment of antibiotics? The challenges never cease, but there is still a whole lot of beauty in this world to balance out the little patches of ugly :).
**A photo of a Sunflower because it is prettier than the thought of my tongue :).**
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I adore Birch trees. The light coloring of the Western Paper Birch with its unique peeling bark and lenticels catch my eye immediately when wandering the forest. Their foliage turns a brilliant yellow during the Fall and the leaves make a beautiful rustling sound in the wind. These trees can grow up to 70 feet tall and 1-2 feet in diameter over 80+ years.
The Native Americans utilized the Birch tree for a number of things. They used the outer bark for the skin of their canoes and to cover their wigwams. They made bark containers for collection and storage of food as well as for cooking. The wood of the Birch was used to make musical instruments, toys for children, and hunting and fishing gear. The bark was also woven into baskets and incorporated into their beadwork.
Birch bark can be used for tinder to start a fire (even when it’s wet), as paper to write on, and can be woven into a hat or a pair of shoes if you find yourself lost in the forest. The sap from the Birch tree can be made into wine or beer and the leaves and inner bark can be turned into a detoxing tea or medicinal cream for issues with the skin.
It is never a good idea to peel the bark from a live, standing Birch. It can leave the tree vulnerable and sometimes it will die, especially if some of the protective inner bark is cut and removed during the process. It is best to remove bark from a fallen tree. Where there are Birch trees there are usually several that have fallen due to disease, high winds, or snow load. Occassionally a larger Birch may become a hazard tree and segments begin breaking off of the top and falling onto whatever is below. If the hazard tree is near a home or building or in an area with a frequently travelled trail, then it should be removed.
While on our recent trip to North Idaho, a large Birch needed to be felled since it was close to a cabin and had lost several feet from its top, most likely due to disease.
As much as I do not like to see trees cut down for the purpose of encroaching on the forest for development, I do understand certain trees need to be removed when they become a hazard to people and other things in their surroundings.
Although no longer standing, this lovely tree still had many gifts to give. We decided to collect the bark to use it for jewelry and other crafts. The trunk will be cut into slices to create beautiful side tables for the cabin and the main log will be milled into lumber for later use. Some of the smaller sections will be used to heat the cabin and the rest will decay over time on the forest floor to provide shelter to small animals and insects and nutrition for new seedlings to grow.
Below is a series of photographs illustrating the process we used for the Birch bark removal. You can use a carpet knife to score the section of bark you want to remove then use the same knife to carefully pull away the edges from the inner bark. Once the outer bark begins to release, slowly peel the sheet from the log. Store the sheets flat or use water and a heat gun later to flatten any curled pieces. And of course remember to thank the tree for its beautiful gifts :).
Here are two examples of pieces of jewelry I have made from this bark over the past few days.
The first is a necklace where I used pieces of bark that had lichen growing on them and incorporated it with earth-toned beads and silver wire.
The second is a pair of earrings I am still designing that mixes bark with metal and alcohol inks.
I just spent ten glorious days “lost” in the woods of North Idaho. This was my first vacation in over two years since dealing with West Nile Virus and then treatment for skin cancer. It felt so good to get far away from the house that had become my hermit’s cave and sanctuary during my illness and treatment. The beauty that surrounded me in Idaho seemed magnified tenfold and I couldn’t stop exclaiming “It’s so pretty here!” As those who have read my book “Zen in the Garden” know, I have always found peace and healing through nature. Following my recent struggles, that desire to reconnect with the earth for a bit of healing has been foremost on my mind.
It was so nice to sit in a quiet place void of the noise pollution of an urban environment for hours at a time. The sound of birdsong and of the wind as it rustled through the pines created the perfect symphony for my tired soul. Each day I could feel my body relax even more than the day before as the stressors of everyday life became nothing more than a fading shadow inside my reawakened mind. I felt present. Mindful. Embraced by what truly matters in this life. I felt alive and happy as I touched the earth and opened my eyes to its simple yet elegant gifts.
As we wandered the woods that surrounded our little log cabin I knew without a doubt that this was where I belonged. It all seemed so familiar to me. It was as if a piece of myself had spent my entire life wandering under that beautiful, peaceful canopy while the other parts had struggled to exist in the chaos of a world quite foreign to my soul. My childhood was spent in an environment similar to this place but I chose to leave it at the age of 18 to pursue a college degree and make my way out in the “real” world. That world has proven to be both rewarding and cruel. I have often felt myself struggle to fit in when my heart keeps telling me to run back into the woods where I belong.
This trip into the woods healed me in more ways than I can explain with words. It brought me peace and it brought me hope. It provided me with a renewed sense of motivation. The wheels are now in motion to make my way back into the woods for good where I can embrace nature for the remainder of my life. No matter how long it takes to reach that goal, I now know it is going to happen. I can’t wait…
Here is a new photomontage piece, “The Butterfly Effect,” I created with the mobile photography apps Juxtaposer, Pixlromatic, and PicFX. The elements for this image are all from photographs I shot with my iPhone in recent years, combined in Juxtaposer and texturized in Pixlromatic and PicFX. You can read my review of Juxtaposer in my last post here.
One of my favorite mobile photography editing apps is Juxtaposer. This app is the mobile photomontage artist’s dream app. It was Juxtaposer that first opened the doors of my creative imagination when I transitioned to shooting and editing with an iPhone. For years I had used Photoshop for traditional DSLR photography editing and had played with a few montage creations. However, I found the use of PS for this type of editing to be time consuming, tedious, and it had a steep and somewhat complicated learning curve for the tasks involved.
I first noticed a number of mobile artists creating amazing photomontage work on the iPhoneArt.com website back in 2011. I was blown away by what these artists were creating on their iPhones and ultimately iPads. I followed several conversations and soon learned about the Juxtaposer app. From the first day I downloaded the app I was hooked. At the time the app was iPhone only and the iPhone screens were not nearly as large as they are today. So imagine me bent over my miniscule iPhone screen erasing details of photographs in order to save one small piece as a stamp to combine with another background photo. Talk about tedious! But the fact I could use my fingers to pinch and zoom and an inexpensive stylus to touch up the details made the experience fun and a lot cheaper than Photoshop and a Wacomm tablet. Plus I could say that I created these pieces from start to finish on my iPhone!
**A few of the pieces I have created with the Juxtaposer app and favorite texture apps.**
As time went, on my iPhone photomomtage pieces all created with Juxtaposer and a few texture apps, began to place in competitions and find their way into galleries, private collections, and publications around the globe. After taking a break from several productive years creating mobile art, I have recently migrated back to using Juxtaposer on my iPad to create illustrations for a new book I am in the process of writing. The fact I can edit with this app on my iPad has improved the user experience ten-fold. Below are some of the steps I took in the app when creating a piece for the book. **Note: this piece is far from finished but I thought it would be fun to share a work in progress while highlighting this app.**
First I chose the base elements that would go into my photomontage based on a concept I had in mind.
**This is the background photo I chose. I shot this several years back in Baja, Mexico.**
**I decided I wanted this baby carriage as part of the scene. I shot this photo in a vintage auto parts store many years back.**
I opened Juxtaposer, started a new session, and I chose my bottom and top images and imported.
I needed to erase everything on the top layer but the baby carriage. To do this I chose the eraser button and began to pinch and zoom the top image in order to get in close to the edges for detail.
When I was happy with the results, I saved the top image as a stamp so I could use it again in the future. I also decided to flip the carriage so it angled towards the cactus for better composition (another tool I love in this app).
After saving my newly created base scene, I added my main character, The Borg, from my saved stamps.
I then began to add more stamps to the scene, in this case the hat and pacifier.
Now that I have incorporated all my main core elements I will continue to touch the scene up by adding shadows to anchor the carriage a bit better to the ground so it doesn’t appear to be floating plus a few more items to finish the scene to my liking. This will be followed by importing the piece into a few of my favorite mobile photo texture apps.
A few of the other tools in Juxtaposer are the ability to adjust brightness, contrast, saturation, opacity, blend modes, and brush settings. my favorite feature of all is the unerase button which comes in handy when attempting to erase close to the edges. Unlike a reset button, it allows you to unerase small parts of your top layer and does not reverse all the work you just painstakingly labored over.
All in all Juxtaposer is a fun app with an intuitive interface for both the beginner and advanced mobile artist.
Just a quick note to tell you about the Goodreads book giveaway for “Zen in the Garden: Finding Peace and Healing Through Nature.” Enter to win one of four softcover versions of the book HERE. The giveaway runs through May 24th.
It has been awhile since I have entered my photography in a competition. For several years I was on a roll and found great success in international competitions while building my portfolio. Alas, that all came crashing to a halt when I had to deal with sudden health issues. Fortunately I have had a respite from those concerns and I am once again back on the creative path.
I recently entered the Mira Mobile Prize competition “Ruas do Mundo” (Streets of the World) and was ecstatic to learn one of my iPhone photographs was chosen by the judges to be included in an electronic display to be shown at the Mira Forum in Porto, Portugal. This display was shown alongside the featured printed work of the top 50 finalists. That news made my week.
I have also recently had the pleasure of two author interviews regarding my book “Zen in the Garden: Finding Peace and Healing Through Nature.” The first interview was conducted by the inimitable Melanie Rockett for her website Proof Positive. You can read the interview here.
The most recent Interview was for the website “Writer’s Interviews” and can be viewed here.
It was a year ago this month that I was diagnosed with skin cancer. That diagnosis resulted in an intense journey of treatment and healing that has literally changed my life. When I reflect on it now I can honestly say there were many gifts that have come out of that transformational journey. The first being a reevaluation of what is important in my life and the decision to spend more time writing. I am honoring that decision and have four more books slated for publication this year. My hope is each one of you reading this blog post will follow your hearts and begin to live your lives with passion and peace.
I have been a tree lover since I was a child. During summer vacations we spent hours building tree forts in the field behind our housing tract with scavanged boards and nails from a construction site. The trees were a combination of old gnarly Oaks and towering Cottonwoods that offered much needed shade to a herd of cattle and a few horses that grazed in the field.
The tree fort was my favorite place to sit and daydream. It also served as my escape from a not so pretty home life. I remember the feeling of freedom it gave me to sit up high, lost in the cover of this massive tree. I felt safe and protected by its branches. If I sat still long enough I could hear what sounded like a chorus of ancient voices drifting through the leaves as they rustled in the wind.
Trees are truly amazing gifts of nature. I have often pondered the thought of their longevity and wished they could tell us the stories of all they have seen over time. Some have been silent witnesses to centuries of history. Others, like the Ancient Bristlecones, have been on this earth for more than 5,000 years. Oh the tales they could tell.
Trees provide shelter and shade for birds and mammals. They help to cool the earth, remove particulates, and provide oxygen for us to breathe. Studies show that hospital patients who are in rooms with a view of trees heal faster than patients who don’t. Also, communities that lack trees have a higher crime rate than those that have them.
I proudly consider myself a “tree hugger” yet I do have a balanced understanding of the need for a percentage of trees to be cut and utilized for human needs. But I become saddened at the thought of our rainforests being decimated with abandon and cringe when I hear about large trees being removed for a development in my city.
If only the trees could impart on us the wisdom they have absorbed over time. Maybe we would understand the need to treat nature and other human beings with more kindness.
So there’s this new app by Twitter called “Periscope.” It is not a photography app per se, but it does utilize your iPhone’s video camera and opens up the world of on-the-go live broadcasting. Normally, I am not an in front of the camera chat type. As a photographer I would much rather hide behind the lens unless I am connecting with clients over Skype or giving an online lecture or interview. But there’s something different about Periscope that has enticed me to jump head first into the world of live broadcasts.
The first thing I loved when I downloaded the app was the easy to understand interface. It is very intuitive with just three simple icons across the bottom.
The first is a television icon which is naturally where you watch live and recorded broadcasts.
The next icon is what appears to be a camera with a small red dot which when pushed takes you to the broadcast screen. The third is your standard people icon that provides you with a list of your Twitter peeps and those on Periscope who are currently the “Most Loved” (those who have accumulated the most likes over time).
When you are ready to broadcast, you push the camera icon. On the broadcast screen you will see a Google maps button if you want to broadcast your location, a lock icon if you want to invite specific followers to a private broadcast, and a Twitter button so a Tweet will be sent out to your Twitter peeps letting them know you are doing a broadcast.
At the top of the broadcast screen you type in an enticing title or whatever you want, then click “Start Broadcast” and off you go, instant live streaming
During your broadcast if you have been lucky enough to garner followers and users who see your live broadcast listed on Periscope or Twitter, their names will begin to pop up on your screen as they join in to watch. If they like what they see, your watchers can tap their screens multiple times and little heart bubbles will suddenly begin to appear and float up towards the top (kind of like a standing ovation). This of course is a great motivator to continue your broadcast. Your audience can also text you questions and comments while you are recording and you can interact with them instantly with your spoken voice.
When you are finished with your live broadcast all you do is swipe down on your screen and choose “Stop Broadcasting.” Your video will then save to Periscope and will be viewable for 24 hours under the television icon for people to view later. You can see the number of viewers that watched your saved broadcast when you click on the video in Periscope under the television icon.
If you want to, you can choose to save all your broadcast videos to your own camera roll automatically as well. The only thing that won’t appear on the videos That are saved to your phone are all the hearts, user names and comments. So if you did a broadcast and had lots of verbal interaction with those written comments and you decide to post that video to your YouTube channel, you might want to preface it with a bit of explanation so viewers won’t think you have lost your marbles. Or not. It’s your seemingly one-way conversationS just might go viral :).
I encourage you to download this app and give it a try. I am having great fun with it and believe it to be an invaluable way to connect with your readers, followers, clients, or audience. The tagline for this app is “Explore the world through someone else’s eyes.” We each have our unique way of seeing and I look forward to experiencing the world as you see it.
Feel free to follow me on Periscope. My user name is Tracy J. Thomas. I can use all the hearts you are willing to give. You can also connect with me on Twitter: @tjthomasphoto.
“When you touch one thing with deep awareness, you touch everything.” – Lao Tzu
I am constantly surprised by nature’s little gifts. A few days ago I went on a walk at the Yolo Wildlife Area and chose to head up the gravel road I have walked dozens of times. There are wetlands that hug each side of this road and it provides a great view of a wide variety of waterfowl and shorebirds.
It was a typical Spring morning where I spotted and photographed Egrets, Blue Heron, American Coot, Mallards, Cinnamon Teal, Northern Shovelers, Ibis, Stilts, and Avocets. I walked and stopped every now and then to capture another photo and marveled at the chorus of birdsong and the beauty of this oasis so close to the city where I live. I felt grounded and thankful that I was able to begin my day in such a wonderful way.
While lost in the moment, I caught a sudden movement out of the corner of my eye. I turned towards a tall Thistle plant on the edge of the water and was amazed to see a Raccoon slip into the water and begin to wade towards a small island of reeds. In all my trips out there I have never come across a Raccoon, especially not in daylight since they are nocturnal creatures by nature.
I stood there amazed at the scene as it unfolded before me. The Raccoon was equally amazed to see me standing there and for a moment we held a silent vigil as our eyes locked on to the other. I raised my camera slowly and took a few photographs and video of this amazing creature and tried to reassure it through my relaxed demeanor that I meant it no harm.
My original intent that morning was to get some exercise in with a nice brisk walk, alas, the Universe had a different plan for me. This unexpected gift found me standing there for a good hour just watching and waiting as the Raccoon waded from island to island and searched the reeds for Crawdads to eat. Every time it would finish its search it would peek out at me from between the reeds then enter the water and make its way towards the next island.
The entire time I stood there watching I felt a smile spread wide across my face. There was nothing else but me, the Raccoon, a Hallelujah chorus of birdsong, and my giant smile. Any stress I felt at the start of that morning was dissipated. It was exactly how nature intended it to be. The two of us, lost in the moment of our surprising communion as we danced our pas de deux to the music of this magical Universe.
“Flow with whatever may happen and let your mind be free.” – Chuang Tzu
I have always been drawn to water. Whether the reflection of the clouds in a calm lake, the peaceful sound of a trickling brook, the hypnotic repetition of waves hitting the shoreline, or the breathtaking sight of a waterfall as it cascades down the face of a mountain, water relaxes me and clears my mind of all the clutter.
Water cools, refreshes, both gives and sustains life. The human body is more than 60% water. Without it we would die. For many, water symbolizes emotional energy, the subconscious, growth, and creative potential. For me it represents the rhythm of life. Water ebbs, it flows, it sits calmly, it roars, it carves canyons out of solid rock, it falls gently from the sky and touches the petals of a rose.
Whenever I have the chance I make my way towards a body of water and I watch and I listen. The song is never the same. The message always different. At times it feels as if it passes right through me, renews me, saturates the parts of me that had dried out from neglect.
If water were to serve as a metaphor for anything in my own life it would be one of change and growth. My most life-changing decisions and moments of growth have occurred when a body of water was present. Whatever water may mean to you, I hope you make the choice to incorporate it into your life on occasion. Walk along the beach and watch the ocean stretch out before you. Put your bare feet in a cool creek and feel it run over and through your toes. Listen to the magnificence as it roars down the side of a mountain. And more than anything let it set your mind free.
** Follow the “Zen in the Garden” YouTube Channel for more “Zen Moments” here. **
Sunday morning I went to church. But this was not your typical preacher at the pulpit, dressed in our Sunday finest, we seek forgiveness for our multitude of sins, here’s five percent of my paycheck, followed by breakfast at Denny’s type of church. It was instead my personal choice of places to go when seeking communion with the Divine. My church of choice is Nature.
I grew up in those traditional houses of worship, but as an adult I find them uncomfortable and often filled with hypocrisy. Please don’t get me wrong, I do not harbor disdain for those who choose a traditional church as their place of worship, but I personally have been unable to find my own peace there.
When I walk in nature with my feet planted firmly against the earth, embraced by the breeze and serenaded by bird song, I become instantly relaxed and at peace. In those moments I feel closer to a God than any other time in my life. Everything makes sense to me as I walk along and see the beauty before my eyes.
Yesterday I had one of those little “Zen Moments” where I felt connected to everything and found beauty in the simple things. My hope for each of you this week is you will find your own Zen moments as you navigate this noisy life.
** Follow the “Zen in the Garden” YouTube Channel for more “Zen Moments” here. **
Every St. Patrick’s Day I think about my favorite grandmother. She was as Irish as they come. She did have some noble French blood traceable back to the time the French Hugenots were driven from France mixed in with a bit of this and that, but she had more fun embracing and identifying with her Irish side.
There was no one in this world who could tell a story the way my grandmother could. On St. patrick’s day she would don her apron and spend all day in the kitchen cooking corned beef and cabbage. Later in the evening with her grandchildren gathered about her feet, she would sit in her rocker and in her best Irish brogue, spin tales of Leprechauns, pots of gold, and St. Paddy himself. We were mesmerized as we hung on every word that poured forth from her mouth in the language of our ancestors.
Her own mother, who I unfortunately never met, came to the U.S. from Ireland as a wee little lassie. My grandmother’s brogue was a part of her own mother and grandmother she loved to mimic when the appropriate occasion would arise. To this day I myself love to break into a bit of the brogue and whenever I do, I feel my grandmother smiling down on me for carrying on a piece of our history.
So to all of you who are of Irish descent and to those of you who simply like to try on a bit of Irish for a day, I say to you (imagine me with an Irish accent) what my grandmother used to say:
“May you be poor in misfortune, Rich in blessings, Slow to make enemies, Quick to make friends, But rich or poor, quick or slow, May you know nothing but happiness From this day forward.”
I have been thinking a lot lately about equilibrium. As humans we are in a constant struggle to reach it, some of us more so than others.
A few days ago I was feeling stressed so I made it a priority to drive out to the local wildlife area and take myself on a walk. As I walked, I found myself involved in a battle to clear my mind. I was trying very hard to let go of the noisy, jumbled list of to-do’s that was being broadcast on one side of my brain while attempting to hush the nagging voice of worry and doubt that was trying to take over my internal dialogue from the opposite side. At the same time my whole mind was working overtime to oppose my spirit. The spirit that desired nothing less than to embrace peace.
As hard as I tried, peace would not be mine that morning. I drove home feeling defeated.
Sometimes life brings you gifts when you least expect them but are most in need of receiving them. One of those gifts arrived that morning as I turned onto my street and pulled into the driveway. I noticed a police car parked in front of our neighbor’s house. As I opened the door and set my keys down, two more police officers arrived. I could hear our neighbor Jenny inside her house yelling and wailing.
Jenny suffers from Bipolar Disorder. She struggles constantly with maintaining a balance. Her equilibrium is off more times than it is on. Even with the help of medication she struggles.
I stood on the porch and observed as the three police officers and Jenny came out of the house. She was highly agitated and began to walk fast circles in her driveway. The police officers were wonderful with her. Their voices were soft, encouraging, and kind. One of them gave her a gentle bear hug when she asked for one. I heard him say “we all need a hug every now and then.”
Jenny continued her fast dizzying circles as she threw her hands in the air and began to preach about God and Heaven and how much she needed to go back to the hospital. The officers redirected her whenever she headed towards the street. Her circles became larger the more manic she became then she would pause for a moment to look up towards the heavens as if waiting for an answer or some sort of relief from her mind’s frenzied state.
I felt my heart break for her and tears began to roll down my cheeks.
I watched Jenny continue to struggle as if lost in some parallel universe where she could not find the doorway to come back home. Then she saw them. A row of beautiful flowers planted against the front of her house. She ran to the flowers and said, “this is exactly what I need to do!” She began to pull the flowers up by the handful to form a bouquet in her hands. Nature in all its beautiful glory was able to catch her attention and provide some semblance of peace for her shattered mind.
As the ambulance rolled away with Jenny and her bouquet, I realized I had found my own equilibrium in the scene that had unfolded before me. I was reminded of the fact we all struggle at times but even when we feel the furthest from peace, our spirits crave it, and seek it out, and eventually find it. My peace came that morning when I witnessed Jenny’s connection to the flowers. The flowers that were right there in front of me the whole time but I failed to notice them until Jenny pointed them out.
I have been thinking a lot lately of endings and beginnings. I suppose my reflection is motivated by several events that have occurred in my life. My age for one. The older I get the more contemplative I become as I slither towards that inevitable ending with this dance on earth. Yet I do realize life can become extinguished at a moment’s notice and not necessarily at the point when one is old and wrinkled and worn out.
The second motivator has been my health challenges over the past two years. First it was West Nile Virus followed a year later by treatment for skin cancer. Both were stressful physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Illness brings you face to face with your own mortality and changes you in ways you could never imagine while in good health.
When friends die or face serious illness or debilitating accidents, especially when they are younger than myself, it causes me to pause and take a good hard look at how I am currently living my life. Over the past month one of my friends and former Aikido Sensei’s, Denise, died from a sudden illness. She was eleven years younger than me. This was followed by the news of my friend Julie’s accident that has left her locked in a coma. Two very valid reasons why thoughts of the precarious balance between life and death have been brought to the forefront of my mind.
Nature is the perfect reflection of endings and beginnings. Within it there are many. It is the place to come to an understanding of the fluid nature of life. When you take a walk in the forest evidence of the cycle of life is everywhere. Out of the decomposing duff created by a fallen tree, wildflower and tree seedlings spring forth. The end of one thing makes possible the other. And on and on it goes.
Spring approaches quickly and the evidence is mounting. That which has passed before has allowed new life to arise. People die and babies are born. A flower wilts and another opens its petals to the sun. One door closes and another one opens. Life continues and ends right in front of us every single day. Whether or not we live the moments we are given fully, is our own decision. Whatever our choice, there will continue to be endings that turn into beginnings and beginnings that come to an end.
This morning I woke up to a cleansing Spring rain. Unlike the east coast, things have been extremely dry here in California so any bit of moisture that falls from the heavens is welcomed with open arms.
So in the spirit of my little book “Zen in the Garden: Finding Peace and Healing Through Nature,” I decided to start my morning off by donning my rain boots and doing a little puddle dance. It was so refreshing to stand in the rain and feel the drops fall on my face. I immediately felt more alive, awake, and cleansed.
For me the rain makes a perfect backdrop to focus on my writing. The remainder of my day will be spent working on one of several companion books to “Zen in the Garden.” The first one I am writing is about growing and harvesting herbs and spices for health and healing.
I will of course take many breaks throughout the day to stand in the rain, take photos of the new blooms in the garden, Look for the rainbow, and refresh my soul. My hope is each one of you will find a bit of time for yourselves today to sit quietly somewhere in nature and renew your souls.
A dear friend of mine who I have known for close to twenty years is entering her fourth week of a coma following a serious auto accident. She was the passenger in a car when the driver fell asleep. Apparently the car hit a guardrail and careened off the highway, then slammed into a concrete drainage ditch nose first. Julie’s head was slammed so hard against the door frame that it knocked her unconscious.
Long before I knew her, when she was in high school, she was in another tragic accident. A car she was riding in with several other high school friends overturned on the Petaluma bridge. It threw several of them from the car. From what I remember at least one of them died. Julie suffered major injuries including a broken neck, back and head. Her survival from that harrowing experience at such a young age changed her, I am certain.
The one thing I know and admire about Julie is her strength and determination. She has always been so full of life, a ball of eminating energy, a true force to be reckoned with. Her laugh is immediately recognizable and can move a room filled with somber, angry people to break out into laughter at a moment’s notice. Physically, Julie is a sleek powerhouse. A bodybuilder and fitness trainer, she has continued to work hard into her 40’s to maintain her health and her strength. She is truly an inspiration.
Like a lot of us, Julie has struggled with her own share of ugly demons in this life but has continued to face them in order to be there for her beautiful daughter whom she loves dearly. I am so proud of her for fighting the battles she has faced. I know in my heart they have not been easy battles. As her friend there have been many days I wished I could have been there for her when life became so difficult. Even though I wasn’t there for her in person, I know she understands in the quiet spaces of her heart I was always there for her in thought and in prayer.
As she lays there in her hospital bed in her deep, peaceful slumber, I often wonder if her spirit is aware. Can she see and hear her family who love her so dearly as they keep a vigil at her side? Does she reach out to touch them ever so lightly on their cheeks from some unseen distance in an effort to comfort and bring them peace while they wait? Is she strolling through a peaceful valley picking a boquet of flowers to give to her mother and daughter when she returns? Can she see her life play back in a slow motion review and finally understand now what an amazing human being she truly is?
Wherever you are right now my friend, whatever you can see or hear or feel, I hope it is nothing less than peaceful. You deserve peace. You deserve rest. You deserve to understand the arms of those who embrace you with their love are not going to leave you. They are there for you and are waiting for you to open those beautiful blue eyes so you can meet the true gaze of their naked, loving souls.
There are days when I find it difficult to concentrate. My mind feels pulled in a million directions and I become frustrated with my inability to accomplish the things I need to get accomplished. This is simply part of being human in this day and age of overstimulation. Too much information coming at us from too many sources. It becomes difficult to filter and discern what is important and what needs to be discarded.
When I feel overwhelmed I know it’s past time for me to get out into nature. One of my favorite places to go is a local wildlife area that sits on the Pacific Flyway. Migratory birds of every flavor take refuge there. Some of these birds fly thousands of miles to reach their Winter or Spring destinations. They amaze me. Flocks of Snow Geese, Swans, and Sandhill Cranes fly right over our house this time of year while headed north to their Spring breeding grounds. Some nights I hear groups of Swans in the distance and if I am not too tired I stand in the darkness of our backyard and wait for their glowing white v-shape to appear over the rooftops. They fly So low you can sometimes hear the whooshing sound of their long wings as they pass overhead.
The Cranes fly by during the day and on several occasions I have watched them catch a rest on a thermal. Their distinct sound becomes more animated as they coast on these circular winds. At times they use them to wait for a few straggling family members to catch up to the group. Their cries become louder as the stragglers catch up. It’s as if they are overjoyed to be together again.
What amazes me the most is I can stand in the middle of this city and be touched by nature as long as I am open and willing to find it. It makes me wonder how many times in my life I have failed to see its beauty or hear it call out to me when I am lost in some shallow reaction to the self imposed stressors of my life. I can choose to be present each day while I am on this earth and embrace all the wonders that bring my soul peace. Or I can remain locked in a fruitless battle with the things that bring me angst and frustration.
As I sit here and reflect in the quiet of the night I realize how lucky I am. My life has not been one of ease. Like many, I have weathered my fair share of trials and tribulations and learned more lessons than I care to share. Yet I am thankful I can stand in awe of nature’s wonders and still find beauty in the small things.
Have you ever stood still in the forest for a moment to listen to the whisperings of all that surrounds you? Have you ever closed your eyes while walking on a trail for a few steps then opened them to see something new you had failed to see just moments before? If you haven’t, I suggest you try it. If you have, then I think you will agree it is a great way to “see” and experience things differently.
Our days are filled with noise pollution and visual stimuli that tends to overwhelm our senses and shut us down to what surrounds us. A self-preservation mechanism that can backfire by blinding us to the beauty that also exists in our everyday environments. In our busy world most of us have lost touch with ourselves and the connection we each had to the earth when we were children.
The simple joy we felt as children has been replaced by mounting stress. The willingness to explore our natural environment with inquisitiveness and a feeling of wonder has diminished over time and been replaced by the shallow demands of life. How sad that we become so lost as adults we forget about the beauty that exists right in front of us.
Life should be about living. Life should be about happiness and joy. When we take a few moments each day to discover and reconnect with the beauty that is in nature we can begin to change our perspective. We can find balance and a renewed sence of peace. It can really be as simple as walking out your door and smelling the flowers for a few minutes before you climb into your car to head off to work. Take a short walk at lunchtime and make a point of finding one beautiful thing in nature that you haven’t noticed before. You don’t have to be in the middle of a forest to find it. You can even find it in the middle of a busy city. Feel the cool breeze on your face, smile at a puffy white cloud in the sky, breathe in the fragrant smell of a flower bed, be inspired by the flowering weed that has pushed its way up through a crack in the sidewalk. It is all around us every minute of the day. So go on. Enjoy!
This is the last day to download the Kindle version of my little book “Zen in the Garden: Finding Peace and Healing in Nature” on Amazon. You can download it here: http://amzn.com/B00TN2GQHM
This morning I decided to heed my words from my little book “Zen in the Garden: Finding Peace and Healing Through Nature.” Being self-employed, tax season is always a stressor. Add to that the demands of work I perform for clients and my attempt to self-promote the launch of my new book and you have the perfect recipe for a potential meltdown.
But if I have learned anything on this journey it is the importance of placing a damper on stress, or at least the way my body reacts to it, before it has a chance to impact my life and most importantly my health. Today I woke up with a long list of to-do’s in my head. Not a good way to start the morning. I didn’t even take a moment to say “Hello world!” My first mistake. But since I have a forgiving heart, I gave myself a hug and decided to go out on a walk at a local nature trail for a quick attitude adjustment.
“Ahhhhh…”
The minute I stepped out of my car and placed a foot onto the trail I felt relief spill over me. I could breathe again. There was a cool breeze that placed a kiss on both cheeks and the morning sun warmed the top of my big floppy hat. Whatever stress I carried when I left my house was instantly replaced with a calm peace as I began to notice the beautiful Spring blossoms that had begun to grace the trees. I felt a smile begin to creep across my face. This is how life is supposed to be. We are meant to be happy and to experience the joy And beauty of simple things.
As my day continues forward I carry that peace I found this morning and feel a renewed sense of groundedness and the ability to focus on my tasks. Do yourself a favor. When you begin to feel stress creep in take yourself out on a walk and find at least one thing you think is beautiful along the way. Take a mental picture, or if you have a camera take a photo and revisit that image throughout your day.
Life amazes me. Constantly. It is a roller coaster filled with ups and downs but it’s the positive moments that tend to surprise and help me to move past the more difficult times. One of those surprises has come from this little book I wrote and published on Amazon.
“Zen in the Garden: Finding Peace and Healing Through Nature” was my way of moving on from recent skin cancer treatment. For those of you who followed my treatment journey you know it was not a pretty nor positive time in my life. In the beginning stages of treatment I spent a lot of time taking photographs out in my garden and in nature. Once I became housebound during the eight weeks of topical chemotherapy I made a point to revisit my nature photos to remind myself of the beautiful things in life.
Nature has always been the one thing in life that grounds me and gives me peace. When I initially began my career as a photographer my focus was on the nature and wildlife genre. That is where I have felt the most comfortable and connected my whole life, so it made since my foray into serious photography would be in that genre. It also makes since that I would circle back to my beginning, to my happy, healing, peaceful place to move forward from this unpleasant chapter in life.
When I wrote this little book it was a healing experience for me but I also had hope the words and photographs would speak to others. So I am amazed at the positive reception, reviews and comments it has received so far since its release. I am even more amazed to find it currently sitting in the #1 spot in two Kindle categories on Amazon.com. It has miraculously reached #1 in “Spiritual Healing” and #1 in Self-Help.
** Screenshot from the book’s Amazon page and its current ranking. **
Zen in the Garden is now FREE for download in the Kindle store through March 4th. You can also purchase a paperback version if you prefer to hold a book in hand. If you do download it I would love for you to leave a quick review on Amazon. Even more I would love for you to share the link with all your friends :).
This morning I woke up to find my little motivational book “Zen in the Garden: Finding Peace and Healing Through Nature” had moved back into the top 100 in three categories on Amazon. It had reached #6 in Spiritual Healing, #9 in Self-Help, and #25 in Short Reads Self-Help. This amazes me and makes me feel very thankful. I wrote this book after my experience with cancer treatment and my hope is it will prove helpful to others who may be experiencing stressors in their own lives.
** You can download the Kindle version for FREE until March 4th here: Zen in the Garden: Finding Peace and Healing Through Nature. Please feel free to share this with your friends or anyone else you think might benefit from this little book.
Hand turned Big Leaf Maple burl bowl.
Adding the finish to the Big Leaf Maple bowl while chucked on the lathe.
**”The Red Shoes.” ©Tracy J Thomas, 2015. All rights reserved.**
on Amazon.
